The Art of Order -V-


“I Am Responsible For Myself”

I am responsible to the people I work with. I am not responsible for them. Feeling responsible for others results in overcontrolling, manipulative behavior. Always being in control means that if my clients don’t succeed in therapy, it’s my fault. It means that if my students don’t learn what I’m teaching them, then surely I am the one to blame.

Being responsible for others is part of the shaming, addictive alcoholic system. What this system taught me is that if something doesn’t go my way, I misuse whatever works to achieve my goal. This might mean blaming others, behaving seductively, being weak, sick, or even changing the subject. I delude myself into believing that I can control the outcome of any situation.

Today, I realize that I do not control life. I do not know how things are supposed to go, or how others are to achieve their lives purposes. Responsibility to others means simply that I will do the best job I can do. I will respect the dignity of others to realize their own responsibility.

~ Rokelle Learner, Daily Affirmations, “June 14“

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